Friendships or just people you know?

The last few months I've been questioning some of the friendships I have. Even all grown up, I can see my friendships are a lot like some of my daughter's friendships. Maybe I'm living in another life and can't seem to find the life I thought I had made. Some of my closest friends I've been questioning "Are we really friends"? There are so many things that has happened to make me think that the friends I thought I had have became just people I know. I can see a big change in some of my closest friends. The more I think about it the more it becomes true. You know putting two and two together... Most of the friends I thought I had only call if they need to use my tanning bed, an air brush or a favor. The past few months it seems like I never get phone calls that mean "Noting". I can count on both hands on how many calls or visits I get that are just that. What I define as true friendship is calling even if there is really noting to talk about.

I know I've changed as I have got older as we all should, but I guess my question is does every event in our lives change us so much to the point that we start a whole other life for ourselves? If you just sit and think about all your friends how many can you call true friends, believe me there is a big difference in people you know and FRIENDS! You know the type; the friend you call when your kids are sick, someone passes away or you just need someone there to hear you vent. I am that type of friend I like to think. I guess I have taken advantage of my true friends and just thought that they would be there forever! I guess I've let the ball drop. I feel more and more alone each day as I sit and think of the strong friendships I had that seem to be moving more out of my reach. What does a person do to regain back the friendships they once had?? I've would like to think that I've tried, but does it matter how hard you try if they are not willing to reach out halfway?? It is sad to say that you do find out who your true friends are when something goes really bad. Why is that the only way we find out... I don't want to find out that way!! Nor do I want my friends to find I'm really their friend only when bad things happen! I want to share the good, laughing, dinner the remember when's... I want the fun times to out weigh the bad times!

If anyone knows what I maybe doing wrong or what I'm not doing PLEASE let me know.... Because the way its going I have no idea what I'm doing!!!